Today I Need Others’ Words

I’m reading through the Psalms now and am finding them incredibly comforting.  It’s almost eerie to hear David expressing such deep sorrow, questioning where God is, pleading with Him, asking if He even hears — my recent prayers almost verbatim.  (Well, okay, way more eloquent.)  I’m so glad I follow a God who is acquainted with suffering.  He can take my raw questioning and feelings, He’s not threatened or surprised by them.

I woke up feeling down and have been teary all day so I found myself returning to the Psalms throughout the day and simply writing them down in my journal, giving me words for prayer as I couldn’t generate any myself.  So I thought I would share some of those as well as a song we sing at my church that has reverberated in my mind the past several weeks.

“How long, oh Lord?  Will You forget me forever?
How long will You hide Your face from me?
How long shall I take counsel in my soul,
having sorrow in my heart all day?
How long will my enemy be exalted over me?
Consider and answer me, oh Lord my God;
enlighten my eyes or I will sleep the sleep of death,
and my enemy will say, ‘I have overcome him.’
And my adversaries will rejoice when I am shaken.
But I have trusted in Your lovingkindness;
my heart shall rejoice in Your salvation.
I will sing to the Lord,
because He has dealt bountifully with me.” -Psalm 13

“Be gracious to me, oh Lord, for I am pining away;
heal me, oh Lord, for my bones are dismayed.
And my soul is greatly dismayed; but You, oh Lord — how long?
Return, oh Lord, rescue my soul; save me because of Your lovingkindness…
I am weary with my sighing,
every night I make my bed swim, I dissolve my couch with my tears…
The Lord has heard the voice of my weeping.
The Lord has heard my supplication, the Lord receives my prayer.” -Psalm 6

The sun comes up, it’s a new day dawning
It’s time to sing Your song again
Whatever may pass, and whatever lies before me
Let me be singing when the evening comes

Bless the Lord, O my soul
O my soul
Worship His holy name
Sing like never before
O my soul
I’ll worship Your holy name

You’re rich in love, and You’re slow to anger
Your name is great, and Your heart is kind
For all Your goodness I will keep on singing
Ten thousand reasons for my heart to find

And on that day when my strength is failing
The end draws near and my time has come
Still my soul will sing Your praise unending
Ten thousand years and then forevermore

Sing like never before
O my soul
‘ll worship Your holy name
Jesus, I’ll worship Your holy name
I’ll worship Your holy name

I cry every time I sing this song because it is a declaration to Him of choosing worship, which is so hard to do much of the time.  It’s something I often have to will myself to do.  And as the Psalms indicate, choosing worship doesn’t mean not doubting or the absence of anger or even feeling God close.  It’s choice, it’s deciding.  The Psalms so often end with promises, specifically of God moving towards us.  These moments of singing are heart-wrenching because I’m in anguish and yet there is also some degree of peace and trust.  That He is the actor in the story.  He is listening, it is His lovingkindness, He deals bountifully with us.

This song is called 10,000 Reasons (Matt Redman) and it’s a declaration of this very thing, that the Lord is at work all around us, in ways we have yet to discover.  It’s a song of expectation of what He will do.  “In the morning, oh Lord, You will hear my voice.  In the morning I will order my prayer to you and eagerly watch (Psalm 5:3).”

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One thought on “Today I Need Others’ Words

  1. Anonymous says:

    Wish I had words of comfort or a balm for the spirit. I wish I knew the right path. I wish, I wish, I wish.

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